At some point in our childhood, we are all asked a straightforward question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, an innocent and pleasant question that usually results in answers that are charming often quite funny, and mostly unrealistic. The reality is that, except for a few people who are traditionally outliers in any case, no one knows what they want to be or what they will become until they’re a bit older and start to realize life is not as predictable as we may have thought when we were looking at it through innocent, juvenile eyes. Tig Notaro and Stephanie Allyne, in their feature directorial debut, interrogate this question in the form of Am I OK?, a charming and genuinely hilarious comedy that centres around Lucy, who has a steady job and a solid group of friends, but who begins to question her own identity when she realizes that she may not have been as honest with herself as she expected. Plunged into a state of existential angst, she decides to embrace these festering feelings and quickly realizes that she may be queer, a stunning realization that she finally decides to stop ignoring and instead embraces, venturing into society as someone no longer looking for love in all the wrong places, and determined to find her place in a world that has always seemed quite strange and confusing. Notaro has been one of the most reliable and earnest comedians and writers of her generation, her candour earning her an abundance of acclaim and consolidating her into the history of her medium – and with her first major directorial effort, which she did alongside her real-life partner, she sets out to explore a range of themes, centring it on the idea of exploring one’s sexual identity, but not being bound by this subject, instead using it as the entry-point into a broader comedy that is daring and genuinely quite profound, especially in how it addresses issues much deeper than its seemingly quaint exterior would initially suggest.

The extent to which Am I OK? is autobiographical or steeped in reality is not clear, but as two prominent queer artists currently working in various roles within the industry, there is a high chance Notaro and Allynne were inspired by their own coming out journey, and of some of the people they know or have encountered over the years. The concept of a late coming out is surprisingly rare in contemporary media, which tends to veer towards exploring the process of coming to terms with one’s sexuality much earlier in their development. The idea that someone is aware of their sexual identity from childhood is a fallacy, since there are countless examples of people in real life who only discover the inkling of queerness later on, and the directors choose this as the foundation for the film, which represents a group of people who may have had questions about their identity early on, but only make the leap to addressing them after some time has passed, which culminates in a beautiful and heartfelt film that is as funny as it is insightful about a seemingly simple subject that is rendered as a genuinely moving examination of queerness from a unique perspective. The reality is that not everyone knows exactly who or what they are during their traditionally formative years, and whether through suppressing any indication of difference or simply coming to develop various curiosities and quandaries that lead one down a path of reconfiguring their identity, there is merit in exploring the process of redefining yourself to be more true to your innermost emotions, which is who and what this film is paying tribute to, doing so with such elegance and wonderful humour. Its perspective on queerness as a whole is extremely meaningful – this is a story about a woman who decides that she is going to take the first (and some may consider most challenging) step towards living her life as authentically as possible, and in an era where the LGBTQIA+ community faces opposition from numerous sources, having a film that profoundly intent on exploring what it means to not only be queer but live your life openly and unabashedly, is a wonderful testament to the values that sit right at the heart of the narrative.

However, as much as queerness lingers heavily over this film, informing so much of what it represents and the story being told, Am I OK? has several unique layers that prevent it from being a one-dimensional comedy that focuses on a single concept, rather than a variety of ideas that vividly intersect and create a more complete portrait of these characters and what they represent. What we come to realize midway through is that, while queerness is central to the plot and the main catalyst for a lot of the narrative, this film is more about friendship. The focus is on two lifelong friends who have reached the age where society has told them they need to have their lives under control and should be marching towards a solid future, rather than flailing about and wondering when they’re going to be able to settle into the comforts of adulthood that they were supposedly promised. Instead, both protagonists are women who realize they aren’t where they want to be, but they bond over their shared inability to find the right path forward. One is stuck in a dead-end job, whereas the other is rapidly rising in her career, but at the expense of a boyfriend who not only does she grow frustrated in wondering when he is going to take their relationship to the next level, but also leaves her entirely when he realizes that she cannot give him the attention he deserves as a result of her career-oriented goals. The friendship between the two protagonists is a fascinating theme, and when coupled with the underlying queer narrative (which doesn’t seep into the story that much – some have asserted a sapphic reading onto their relationship, but the film itself implies that it is merely platonic), it makes for a beautiful and poignant story of companionship, and the boundaries that they come across when trying to work through life’s challenges together, becoming each other’s support system but also pursuing their paths. Am I OK? is a wonderful and evocative portrayal of friendship, and the importance of those who enter into our lives, assuring us when we are unable to help one another.

Despite having amassed quite an impressive roster of films over the years, there is still a sentiment that Dakota Johnson is not an actor who has proven herself, which is bewildering considering the multiple films in which she showcases her unique charms and clear talents. She’s a genuinely captivating performer and capable of holding our attention whenever she appears on screen, which is becoming a more common occurrence as various filmmakers seek out collaborations. Am I OK? features may be her finest performance to date, at least in terms of showcasing the clear gifts that those who have always been drawn to her acting have acknowledged and recognized. It’s not a complex character on the surface, since she’s essentially just playing a young woman negotiating the fact that she is now on the other side of thirty, and has to handle the various challenges that come with realizing that she can no longer depend on youthful ignorance as an excuse for her supposed stagnation in both her personal and professional life. The key to the success of this film is not that it draws out a wonderful performance from Johnson, but rather that it constructs itself as a two-hander, with Sonoya Mizuno playing the other co-lead, in her most prominent role to date. Much like Johnson before her rise to fame, Mizuno is mainly known for being a reliable supporting player, taking on smaller roles that leave an impression without being the focus. Notaro and Allyne saw her capabilities and cast her in this co-lead role, which allows her to run the gamut of emotions alongside Johnson, the film becoming a complex examination of their relationship. Both actors are terrific, and bring such nuance to their roles, developing a strong chemistry to the point where we genuinely can believe that they are best friends. Supporting parts from Sean Hayes, Molly Gordon, Kiersey Clemons and Notaro herself in a scene-stealing cameo add layers to the film, making it an absolute delight when it comes to the characterization of the main players in the story, creating a vibrant tapestry of individuals and their various eccentricities, providing an abundance of depth to the narrative.

Am I OK? is a film that has several layers that it needs to work through before becoming entirely successful, and considering it is the debut of both directors, there was a significant amount of effort that needed to be done to prevent it from becoming too heavy-handed, especially considering how much of the story is driven by emotions, which could have grown unwieldy without the right approach. We find a lot of humour embedded in this film, which screenwriter Lauren Pomerantz manages to effectively convey, an endeavour that ultimately rewards the patient viewer. Much like her comedy, Notaro infuses this film with the exact kind of deadpan, stone-faced optimism that has defined her as a comic, and we find that the film is very much formed to match a lot of her interests and curiosities. This is not always a film that knows exactly what it wants to be, but it does manage to convey the sense that it wants us to feel sincere empathy for these characters, but not to the point where it needs to be a dense, overly emotional experience. Instead, the tone is charming but quite subtle, with only the most important moments being subjected to a sense of lingering sensibility. It’s certainly difficult to make a film like this that tackles such intimidating themes in a way that is rarely overwrought, especially considering the story features characters that are as unstable and offbeat as their experiences. The simplicity is essentially what allows Am I OK? to feel like such a sincere, meaningful piece of storytelling, and the genuine humour is only additional merit to the underlying story, which serves to be a bittersweet and heartfelt ode to friendship, as seen through the eyes of two people who have not quite figured out their lives yet but are willing to undergo a process of trial and error until they reach their goal, which is essentially what we all do when it comes down to trying to navigate life without falling apart entirely, a recurring theme throughout this delightfully charming comedy.

Queer cinema is undergoing a renaissance as it becomes more mainstream (a long overdue development), so its wonderful to encounter something that is this bold and willing to have some surprisingly difficult conversations about identity and queerness, and how these are both complex concepts that cannot be easily shoehorned into a single neat narrative. Am I OK? obviously doesn’t reinvent the genre, but it also doesn’t need to – instead, it offers a reliable and consistently amusing glimpse into the lives of these characters as they navigate treacherous emotions, explores their identity and develop stronger friendships through facing several obstacles, some of which seem to be on the precipice of destroying their overall connection. A charming, upbeat and genuinely funny comedy with a lot of heart and soul, and driven by a wonderful sense of humour and a lot of intricate commentary, this film proves to be an absolute delight for several different reasons. Notaro and Allyne prove themselves to be fantastic filmmakers, their humour being precise and meaningful, and having multiple layers that they are not afraid to explore in detail. Anchored by a fantastic pair of performances from Johnson and Mizuno, as well as a terrific supporting cast, and encapsulated by sincere attention to detail, this film is a wonderful diversion, the rare kind of comedy that gets everything right and is not afraid to look beneath the surface at certain ideas that would be unwieldy in the hands of anyone who wasn’t aware of the intricate layers of meaning that define and guide this tremendous and moving comedy.